BANANA: APIA Bloggers Roundtable-Nov 21st

For all you folks who want to see our fugly mugs in person or give us a piece of your mind/rotten tomato, here’s your golden opportunity:

Peep the blogroll!

Lac Su, author of the much-propped I Love Yous Are For White People (see AZN’s review here), in partnership with Steve Nguyen, TV/film producer and head of LA channelAPA.com, have organized a (FIRST!) massive roundtable of APIA bloggers, including some heavies like Angry Asian Man and 8Asians, and advocates like Asian Pacific Americans for Progress and AARising . Believe you us, BCB is deeply honored to share table and flyer space with these folks.

During the filmed event, we’ll be discussing the future of the online APIA community’s voice, how we can work together on relevant issues, and other fun stuffs. This will be followed by an audience Q & A and meet & greet, and here is your chance to give AZN your phone number and let me stare deeply and creepily into your eyes and compliment your haircut. This is your cue to buy me a drink. Single malt, please. Wait, where are you going? Cheapskate.

See you there!  More info here.

Saturday November 21st

4 to 6 pm

Uni of Southern Cali

Taper Hall Room 201

FREE, Cheapskates!

Politicians in Lurv: Michelle Rhee & Kevin Johnson

Extra Extra! Nuptials are looming for the recently engaged Washington DC Schools Chancellor Michelle Rhee and Sacramento Mayor (and former NBA and Berkeley ball player Kevin Johnson). Talk about a public sector power couple: Ba-da-bing!

Gov't mental oochie boochies

Seriously. With left and right coasts cornered, they will be an unstoppably sessay political force. Watch your back, and you better buy them a nice wedding gift if you want your kid to get into a good school.

Thanks Sherdizz!

Friday Fuckery: David Chang Drunkstedness

Since chef David Chang has received much flak recently (including from this blog) from his “Fig-gate” controversy, I’m linking to this just for the hell of it. And because of the the lovely K-Town fried chicken footage. And plenty of delightful slurring on the part of Chang.

Although Chang has a reputation for being a douche, I have to give him respect for his taste in food and some choice one liners:

Sue Chan: Woo! This is spicy.

David Chang: Are you Asian?!

Off camera: What’s the preparation for the pork?

Chang: The preparation for the pork is a couple teaspoons of salt, and some black pepper, and a couple hours of don’t fuckin worry about it.”

But one thing really bugs me: what happened to Sue Chan’s pants?

David Chang/Anthony Bourdain vs. The Bay

I’m a little late to this, but I’ll post it anyway. This comes from a post by foodandwine.com about Anthony Bourdain and David Chang of Momofuku. All you really need to know are the two following quotes:

David Chang on San Francisco restaurants: “There’s only a handful of restaurants that are manipulating food,” and “every restaurant in San Francisco is serving figs on a plate with nothing on it”

Anthony Bourdain referring to Alice Waters (of Chez Panisse) as “Pol Pot in a muumuu” and saying “Alice Waters annoys the living shit out of me. We’re all in the middle of a recession, like we’re all going to start buying expensive organic food and running to the green market. There’s something very Khmer Rouge about Alice Waters that has become unrealistic … I’m suspicious of orthodoxy, the kind of orthodoxy when it comes to what you put in your mouth.”

All I gotta say is I respect all the above chefs, and love the food at Chez Panisse, all the Momofukus, and even Les Halles (to a certain degree). But damn, hating on an entire city’s cuisine? WTF? I knew you were a DOUCHE Chang, but you really are a bigtime douche. You, with your backpack running out of Momofuku Milk Bar that one time I was eating your delicious cookies and needed to shit so bad cause it was so rich with yummyness. I shoulda stepped up to you for what you said about SF, except I was busy desecrating your bathroom (as well as my other two friends messing up the Ssam Bar bathroom, don’t worry, I won’t out you, *cough* cheezu *cough* JiP).

And to Bourdain. You can do no wrong after you said you were gonna move your family to Da Nang, the most gangsta of all of Viet Nam (IMHO), so I’ll give you a free pass for hating on Berkeley cuisine. Just this one time.

Lac Su’s I Love Yous are for White People: The Asian American Identity in America

I Love Yous Are for White People is definitely a great read. I was going to write a review, but my boy Minority Militant has one already, which you can check out here. I just wanted to touch on what I found most compelling about the book, the subject of Vietnamese American identity, and what it meant to me when I was reading the book. There are some spoilers below, because I mention some of the folks in the novel… So be warned!

The only time you'll see Dodger Blue on BcB. The ONE exception.

Lac came over to LA-LA at a time when Vietnamese folks were still new to the states and Westminster was developing as a Little Saigon. So he, like many Vietnamese folks coming over, was jumping from one world to the other (VN to the US) and then discovering his own identity in a city with a ridiculous amount of diversity: A Latino street gang, a Vietnamese American graffiti gang, a predominantly Chinese (then White) high school, a loving Latino American family and Lac’s own Vietnamese family all played prominent roles in his life. The book depicts pivotal moments in Lac’s life where he was given a choice of several different worlds. Because to accept one, is to reject the other. There was hardly any overlap when you’re rolling with a Latino gang or a Vietnamese American graffiti gang. Lac’s description of growing up Vietnamese in America surrounded by Latinos is a unique perspective that not many get to experience in the world.

Reading about Lac’s childhood at that time, in that place, gave me some insight on how the “American transition” for folks back then was like. The way Lac grew up learning about “nhau” felt like he was seeing it as something inherently foreign, but surprisingly familiar. I think we all feel that way about our Asian motherland’s culture when we experience it as Asian Americans. What does it mean when I go to “nhau” spots in OC to eat pig intestines and drink Beer 333 and end up relating to it no differently than when I hit up Korean bars and eat Dukbokgi with soju/OB beer or Teppanyaki with Kirin at a Japanese spot. I feel like I am so far removed from the experience, that although I speak the same language and grew up in a Vietnamese household, in some ways, I am fetishizing my own culture like I grew up as a My Trang. I can’t speak for Lac when it comes to this outsider looking in perspective, but I can definitely tell you that this is how I felt while I was reading his book.

So I would say this book easily appeals to all folks that are close to the immigrant experience, but still on the cusp of both cultures. For all the folks that took ESL classes in school and learned very early on that its hard to stay friends with your elementary school rainbow collation friends forever, this book is for you. For those of you that are repulsed by the mere mention of coagulated duck blood you should probably read The Lost Symbol (doesn’t Robert Langdon get into the craziest situations?!). For those of you that just came over from Viet Nam, and not entirely fluent in English yet, this book is for you if you bug Lac to get the book translated, especially for his pops.

And to Lac, my biggest criticism is the same as TMM’s, I felt the book was cut short. I  wanna hear about your life in high school and what it was like during that time to be in an interracial relationship. That would provide a lot of people, including myself, that have tried to figure out if losing the comfort of being two nondescript Asian folks dating or the ease of speaking your native tongue to Vietnamese folk is worth the sacrifice of all the stares you get when you’re out with a girl of a different race. I’d like to say yes, to some degree, for the right person, but I’d like to hear the story from your own perspective, Lac. Your idol, Augusten Burroughs, blessed us with more than one book, and I hope the same for you.

And send me an iTunes playlist of your music too. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Etta James next to Tupac on a playlist before…

First Expressions / 7th Annual American Indian Film Fest

Heads up Northwest! If — in the words of Far East Movement — you “got a fetish for these kicks…Air Forces, Air Maxes, even had a a pair of Vans…K-Swisses, Chuck Taylors, can’t forget the Timberlands….gotta have it, I’m a fiend….” then you may have heard of 8th Generation/LG’s: custom-made, hand-painted Vans, Chucks, and other fly kixxx.

Drawing on multiple experiences to infuse Coast Salish designs with an urban and occasionally comix-y flavor, artist/activist Louie Gong has seen what started as an experiment with a Sharpie strike a chord and generate overwhelming demand not only from the Native community, but sneaker freaks worldwide.

Gong’s art will be on display Thursday November 5th through Saturday November 7th  — including shoes, prints, and hand-made cedar skate decks — as part of the First Expressions exhibit and 7th Annual American Indian Film Festival. Other featured artists include good folks design genius Victor Pascual, filmmaker Tracy Rector, and photographer Clarita Begay. Cuzin Matt will even be traveling all the way from our Neighbour to the North to serenade ya’ll with some croons ‘n’ tunes.

The documentary UNRESERVED: The Work of Louie Gong will also premiere as part of the Film Festival.

Friday November 6th:

Artist Reception with refreshments at 5 pm

UNRESERVED Screening at 7 pm

Carlson Theatre, Bellevue College

3000 Landerholm Circle SE, Bellevue WA

FREE

Go pick yourself up a print & a pair and sing along…

Dim Sum Burlesque

Two things I am a fan of: Dim Sum. HELL TO THE YES.

Burlesque: Sure, why not. When presented with the right style (camp, drag, genderbender, retro) and by and for the right audience (queer-friendly, fat-friendly, subversive, radical women of color-type folks…i.e. NOT a bunch of hooting frat boys of the strip club variety).

But together? Eh….UrbanDaddyNYC (like an online GQ for pretentious, well-off, straight male urbanites…tho they do have some nice heads up on happy hours) recommended the weekly “Dim Sum Burlesque” as the latest must-see happening.

Presented by “Calamity Chang“, it’s described as an “exotic” night of “titillating performances”.  Of course, whenever referring to Asian women or Asian food (which are already closely coupled thanks to popular film, porn and naked sushi trends), gotta throw in the E-bomb just to make sure white folks understand they’re in for a real Ching Chongin’ treat. So we already have the icky naked flesh + food combination, now let’s racialize it with a Chinese female headliner and dim sum. Gong!!!

Although it looks like not all the dancers are Asian, this reminds me of an exhibit I recently saw at the new Museum of Chinese in America, which included a piece on the “Chop Suey Circuit” of the ’30s and ’40s…dinner theaters emphasizing the exotic “Chineseness” of performers paired with Americanized Chinese food….kinda like a Chinkified Cirque de Soliel.

I’m already not convinced I wanna be chowing down on ha gow or chicken feet (which I doubt will be on the menu….these “jetset” whiteys can’t handle it) while watching ladies disrobe, however elegantly. I prefer my yum cha backdrop to be purple-haired aunties gossiping at high decibels and fat-cheeked chillun scampering underfoot.

I’m tempted to go just to check out the audience demographic and the sex + Chinese food jokes that pop up. Then again, for my mental sanity and free-floating rage issues, I’d better not. If anyone does end up seeing this, I’d be interested to read your impressions, and whether this Calamity chick earned herself a spot on BCB’s top hoebag list.

Friday Fuckery: Taser Fun

I was gonna do a fucked up Halloween costume-themed post, but I think we all can identify what this constitutes, plus I already made a reference to it in this month’s racism roundup.

In lieu, I present you with this scary “shocker” (get it! haha!…whut?) of a video. Apparently this kid is missing the part of his brain that regulates the “Good Idea/Not A Good Idea” function.

Happy Halloween! Be safe ya’ll, and leave your tasers at home, unless you’re a lay-dee in a skanky costume. Then you might wanna have it handily tucked in your cleave and set to “stun”.

via Buzzfeed

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson Does White-Face

To the readers of BcB, is it awesome that The Rock gets chosen to voice the lead character of an animated movie even though the astronaut he plays is White? Or are you annoyed that the lead character has to be blond haired/blue-eyed instead of being modeled after The Rock’s African Canadian/Samoan heritage?

Kate Moss’ Oriental TopShop Collection

TopShop: I don’t get it. When the NY store opened this summer in SoHo, a line of eager shoppers wound around the block for days. In terms of quality or style, the clothes are perhaps a marginal cut above what you’d find at H&M or Forever, but several cuts above in terms of price.

When I was living in Scotland about 8 years ago, TopShop was about the cheapest trendy fare out there, meaning I was all up in that bitch blowin’ pounds every Tuesday, Thursday, and Lord’s Day (a cute shirt would run you about $7). I don’t understand why a foray into the American market translates into a 1000% price markup. Maybe it’s got something to do with being endorsed/”designed” by a coked up, scenester supermodel?

Which brings me to Kate Moss’ upcoming 2009 Christmas Nightwear Collection, which launches tomorrow. Apparently her overpriced ($57 for a sleep mask? You can’t just use the free one from the Jet Blue redeye?!) nighties and PJs are “inspired” by all things Eastern, meaning pieces labeled “Geisha Rose Print Blouse” and “Oriental Butterfly Print Kimono” ($138).

Christ, people — it’s almost 2010 — is a multinational design company really still using the word “Oriental”? Yeah yeah, technically it applies to an object and not a person, but is it really necessary to throw in this lame, loaded term at all? Then again, the fashion industry hasn’t exactly been a shining example of cultural sensitivity, with faux Native headresses, African headwraps, and China Doll getups cycling in and out of vogue and runways every other year.

Personally, I feel sleepwear is for sleep, not for lookin’ cute (we Wimmins is expected to look sessay the other 16 hours of the day…c’mon we need a break assholes!), which means an oversized Jabbawockeez tee and holey Garfield boxers from 1994 will do me just fine, thank you.

Thanks Charlie!