Friday Fuckery: Obama Booty Grab

While on a West coast fundraising tour, President Obama swung by unannounced to the Great Eastern Restaurant yesterday in San Francisco’s Chinatown to nab some takeout.

What ensued was a gaggle of ecstatic customers, a lot of handshaking, and a few old Chinese ladies partaking in a fistful of Presidential rumpus:

The expressions of the guy in the tan shirt and the Secret Service agent are the next best things about this photo.

Susan Walsh, Associated Press

That’s right, Chinese matrons appreciate a good ol’ rear squeeze as much as the next law-abiding, Buddha-revering civilian. But they have the cahones to do it brazenly in front of Secret Service, the American press, and their grandkids. And repeatedly:

Nothing woos a Prez like a flossin' COOGI sweater

Saul Loeb, AFP/Getty Images

Some onlookers will claim that such sweet seniors are virtuously bereft of all bawdy intent (or just short), but I say: THEY KNOW WHAT’S UP. If anyone is hip to using physical and social stature to honey badger through life — whither cutting in line at the bakery, running you over with a laundry cart, or taking the liberty to cop a patriotic feel, it’s your gangsta ass Ee Ma and Pau Pau. You know they’re gonna be bragging about their Mack Meemaw skills at the mah-jong table til next Lunar New Year.

Get some, golden gurls! I can’t wait til I’m an old Chinese lady and I can just grope with abandon, up to the very highest echelons of the American political system. Thus is the beauty and true meaning of democracy.

Cheers to Obama and the Granny Grab!

Thanks Sherilyn! – This seriously made my year.

source (and more heartwarming pics!): San Francisco Chronicle